what if i didnt make that choice back then?
what if i stick to what i wanted?
what if i perservered long enough?
what if it could be reached?
what if i would be happier now?

BUT what if i did make that choice?

would i regret it later on?
would i feel what i am feeling right now?
would i feel happier?

i am tired of everything around me
tired of having to do so much things
tired of having to think of the future
and at the same time afraid to think of it
because i am afraid i will not have the means to continue

what if i died tomorrow?